Day #43-45 Competition, Goals, Challenge!

Competition went pretty well. Considering I missed a couple of lifts, weird thing Is I felt a little tired because I think I didn't eat enough before hand. Oh well live and learn I suppose. New goals are to increase my lean body mass and get stronger. I NEED to have my numbers go up. My weight is fine and everything I just need to stay clean in my eating. Goals are to get my back squat up and keep my form and back strong. Those are huge in order to lift more efficiently.

Grieving Process...

After my Grandpa passed it was hard to deal with it for the first couple of days. Then I just tried to just stay strong for my family. I already paid my respects and said my Goodbye and had my closure. I feel good about that. But now that I am going to the funeral its going to be hard to stay strong. Seeing everyone so sad and the ones who stood the strongest crumble. My dad the emotionally strongest person I have ever met. I will see him break down emotionally. It takes a real man to stay strong when everyone is looking at them for hope and keeping everyone together. But when its a time of grieving... in the end everyone is only human. 

Most heart wrenching thing I ever heard.

My grandpa just gave the most heart wrenching speech. He said "Thank you guys for coming.........I wish you all the world, ..........I love you all very much,............. hopefully I see you in the morning" .  Dam. That nearly killed me. No words could possibly describe how his words will be engraved into my brain.. it was like we were in a movie or something. It was insane. Your so strong grandpa hang in there!

I wrote this Before i knew my grandpa passed away.

I am standing alone in the dark, 

searching and thinking how to start,

should I cry with all the rest,

or should I keep it in and build the stress?

Stress that will haunt me till the end of time?

because i couldnt help him or give him time.

because he is slowly passing away,

and i truly wish i can give him a day,

i love him like any kid should,

I should be by his side i truly should,  

But i can’t and i dont know why, 

But when i see him i will cry,

cry because i am mad,

because one day that will be my dad, 

but that is dar away from now, 

but i have to know and find out how, 

how to deal with the suffering and pain,

and guide my family through the rain, 

through the rain and into the light, 

because our futures are still very bright, 

it is hard but we will get threw it, 

death comes we already knew it, 

we knew it was gonna come but not so fast,

so let’s be there for him till the last, 

R.I.P Grandpa We miss you. 

http://www.tumblr.com/blog/mroptimisticsocal

Two a day training.

Well today i started my two a day training. Its not like its body building but its more for purpose.
For Olympic lifting you have to have strong lats, core, shoulders, and back. Those are the other main factors besides the obvious leg strength needed. So my coach wrote a workout for me to strengthen those areas i need to be stronger at. Feels good to be in the gym twice a day.